Every once in a while a product will hit the market that makes you say, “Now why didn’t I think of that?” This is not one of those products.

Are you tired of having just plain ol’ brown turds? Well worry no more. Take this fancy pills and your poop will glitter like it’s been touched by Midas himself!

Apparently they are only $425. I wonder if they have them in stock at Walmart?

[originally found at dvice.com]

As a kid, I remember going to the fountain soda machine and getting a splash of every flavor soda mixed in to one cup. I think we may have thought we were cool. Or Tough. Or something like that.

I was recently introduced to Vosges Chocolate. They seem to take pride in mixing off things with their chocolate. Need an example? How about this gem? Chocolate covered Bacon.

Pardon me while I throw up in my mouth a little bit.

How fucking sweet would it be to have a car with doors that did this?

No seriously, watch it again. This is ridiculous:

I can’t get enough of it! I was the kid in the car who’s dad always yelled at him to stop pushing the auto-window buttons all the time. Up, then down, up then down, (and then to piss him off), up, half way down, and up a little, then all the way down again.

Imagine what I’ll be like when this hits the street:

If I owned this car I’d volunteer to be the DD every night just to watch my shitfaced friends try to figure out where the door went:

And one last replay:

Yes, that was awesome.

When I first saw this, I immediately thought “Those wacky Japanese.” Turns out, I was way off. It’s the wacky Chinese, this time!

If it’s not strange enough that there is a restroom with 1000 toilet stalls on four stories, how about the fact that they are in all sorts of bizarre shapes? Why not take a leak on the Virgin Mary. Or perhaps in to the mouth of a growling bear?

CNN.com Reports:

“We are spreading toilet culture. People can listen to gentle music and watch TV,” said Lu Xiaoqing, an official with the Yangrenjie, or “Foreigners Street,” tourist area where the bathroom is. “After they use the bathroom they will be very, very happy.”

Some urinals are uniquely shaped, including ones inside open crocodile mouths and several topped by the bust of a woman resembling the Virgin Mary.

There are also plans to build a supermarket nearby, which will sell toilet-related items, CCTV reported.

Oh, and don’t forget to wash your hands on the way out.

Normally when my dog is found eating anything out of the fridge, he’s in trouble for doing it. So who in their right mind would start stocking up the fridge with beer for their dog? Not me, I say! But, looks like there are others who will.

One time while driving through Texas I notice that every other corner had a “Big & Tall” store. There was very little need for the Tall section, but everybody in that area was fat. Not a little fat, I mean a LOT fat! Well, I have found out why. Apparently the have been eating too often at this guy’s restaurant… What’s his specialty, you might ask?

Chicken Fried Bacon Strips

Your may have just felt your cholesterol go up just by reading the name…

I can’t wait to try it!

BikeForest.com asks the question:

Have you ever wished you could get a quality treadmill workout without paying expensive gym prices?

What a stupid fucking question! Why not ask, “Have you ever wished you could lick your own butthole?”

The idea of a treadmill is to walk in one place while avoiding the elements outside. So, why in the world would I need to put wheels on my walking? It just makes no sense. If you are going to go outside for a walk, do you really need a treadmill to do it? And, a treadmill with wheels… ridiculous!

I wonder if you can get this bundled with soap on a rope…?

Southern Nevada really doesn’t have much of squirrel population problem like some states do, and its too bad. I don’t think that our desert bunnies would react to the following gadgets the same way. Squirrels can provide hours and hours of pure entertainment if you engage them correctly. Check out the Twirl-A-Squirrel for instance

But that first video was just to warm you up. It was warm and fuzzy and PETA safe. Now, for something a little more hardcore: the Squirrel-apult!

UPDATE: After seeing this third video I could not help but add it. Electricity + Squirrel = AWESOME!

WHY WHY WHY do they continue to mess with a good thing?!?! Original Pepsi is the best soda on the planet. I could drink a gallon a day and never get sick of it. Why do they continue to add other flavors in? Pepsi with Lime? GROSS! Pepsi with berry flavors? Yuck.

What I want to know is, who is coming up with the ideas for new flavors to add in to my favorite drink? This guy needs to be kicked in the nuts. As you’ll see below, this guy has gone too far!

Pepsi with Cucumber? Are you kidding me? What’s next? Pepsi with Krispy Kreme? Pepsi with Ranch Dressing? Come on, guys. Just stop it!