Artist: T. More
Song: Hey There, Kids!
Album: The Whitest Kids You Know.

Lyrics to Hey There, Kids!

Hey there Kids! I see you’re feeling blue,
Parents push y’around and tell you what to do.
Dad makes you clean your room and go to bed,
Instead of watch TV you have to do homework instead.

And I know it makes you angry And you’re full of rage,
Let me tell you a secret I wish I knew at your age.
Next time your angry and you wanna fight back,
Just tell your teacher that daddy likes to play with your sack.

[chorus:]
And you can get a new daddy, get a new daddy,
Police will take the old one away in a caddy.
You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy,
Stay up real late, kick back and light up a fatty.
You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy,
In a couple of months you’ll probably get a new daddy.
Get a new daddy, get a new daddy.
In a couple of months you’ll probably get a new daddy.

Now for a little while you’re new daddy’s cool,
Buys you things and tries real hard to bond with you.
He let’s you eat candy and play video games,
But your friends at school all think that he’s kinda lame.

Now you can’t have your buddies making fun of your dad.
And all n’all this one’s not so bad.
But you think you might want to try once more,
Take naked polaroids of yourself and leave them in his sock drawer.

[chorus repeats]

Now your mom is wondering what’s wrong with her,
and why she keeps attracting men that are dirty pervs.
She has a breakdown and cries and cries,
And after a while she’s institutionalized.

[altered chorus:]
And you can get a new mommy, get a new mommy.
A new brother and sister, new house and new mommy.
Get a new mommy, get a new mommy.

New brother, new sister, a new house and new mommy.
Get a new mommy, get a new daddy,
Stay up real late, kick back and spark up a fatty.

You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy,
Police will take the old one away in a caddy.
You can get a new daddy, get a new mommy,
New brother new sister, a new house and new mommy.

Get a new mommy, get a new daddy,
Stay up real late, kick back and spark up a fatty.
Get a new daddy, get a new daddy,
In a couple of months you’ll probably get a new daddy.

[Originally found on college humor]